Hi!
There are several times when there is a dual thoughts that fights together but I am not able to logically find what makes sense and a way out. This is a recurring thing that happens. So I have been thinking to start writing about it in the hope to find some connections and find myself, choose myself, the truest self. I am starting this just post just as a place holder because I don’t know when I will actually start to write.
I thought of writing this in logseq as journaling but it seems I am not able to write that way. Writing here as a post motivates me in doing that.
Sometimes I feel (recurring) that I can not be loved. The extent to which I know myself, even I don’t like who I am and what I am. I have this fear that if people came closer and looked into me inside and out like I do, it will be very hard for them to have a feeling of love towards me and I believe they are reasonable in doing that as well. I know I might be exaggerating but I am entertaining this thought because I am curious what if that’s true.